Writing

I think I may try writing again. I like doing it even though when I started writing in 8th grade my best friend at the time said I was horrible at it. I don’t feel like you have to sound like a poised person to write. I feel like writing should be how you feel the words flow through you. Whether they are small simple words or large complicated words. Let’s see where this leads me.

Football games

In highschool I went to the football games because Cora was IN the band. I would wander around with friends and hang out with the band. I didn’t have to pay because I was with the band. I helped move equipment for them too.

Some things never change. I went to my first college football game to watch Cora CONDUCT the band. So here is me. Still going to football games not knowing what’s happening on the field. Barely able to see them anyway besides a bunch of guys falling over top of each other and chucking each other. Just to see her and the band.

I did start getting into it though. ODU lost though. I love seeing my sister do what she does. I’m so proud of how far she has come.

Art and What it Means to me

Art is something I turned to when I needed something to help calm me down or needed an escape from something. I liked watching colors blend together and making different patterns and colors. To be completely honest, my landscapes still need work, but that’s why you practice. Art has kept my mind at peace when life gets chaotic. It is one of the several self-care techniques I use to help myself zen.

Something I learned…

Something I learned today was, I don’t want to be the adult that when asked what I would do if I went back and started over in life in regards to a career, that I would change what I wanted. I want to follow my dreams. I don’t want to have regrets. I want to do everything that I wanted to do. Follow the paths that I want to follow. Live life to the fullest and live like there may not be a tomorrow.

Some days..

There are some days that I don’t want to do anything anymore. There are days where people’s attitudes are too much for me. There are days where everything being said to me makes me cry. There are days where I don’t know if I can take much more. How can I keep going? How can I keep putting up with it? How much more am I willing to take?

Your dreams

I fully believe you should follow your dreams no matter what people say. Especially if your family or someone you love is against it or not supporting it or you feel like you have to hide your true self. Do it anyway. Even if you don’t tell them about it. Follow what you’re passionate about.

I’m bad about following my own advice. I am a people pleaser but I need to start putting myself first. If I’m not even pleasing myself, how can I please others?

No matter if someone is calling me lazy, or that I’m not doing enough and I need to get a traditional job. There are things that I can do to to make myself happy and sometimes that is not following what they are telling me to do. Put yourself first.

Books

I get very into books. I immerse myself within them. Become the characters. Live their lives. Empathize with them. Cry over them. Get very angry over things that aren’t real. I love to escape my own reality. However sometimes authors drive me crazy. I know their entire job is to twist the plot and make it so you can’t see what’s coming but sometimes all I want is a happy ending. What’s even worse is when you are reading and going through the series and then realize the last book in the series doesn’t come out for another 9 months and the author left you on a giant, and I mean massive cliff hanger. I just want to know what’s next but now I have to wait. For my book readers – SPOILER ALERT. She killed off the love of his life for 2 books and then brought her back at the end of the 4th book when he was finally getting ready to move on after 16 years. I am so upset about this. These books had me laughing hysterically and then crying. I can’t wait till may when I can read it and find out what the hell happened.